The Middle 3

Crab! Buddy! Hang on. Help is coming! 

Oh, man my head is killing me. I don't think I'm gonna make it.

Hold on!

Swan runs up to the bar.

Can you rush those Bloody Marys? We're dying here.

Bartender sliding two down,

Call 911. 

Thanks Swan. Oh boy that is soooo good. Hey, let's hit the breakfast buffet.  I'm starving.

The Middle 2

Hey Tri?
Yes-amundo.
Remember that book that leaked through the fourth dimension and I was able to glom onto it with my face?
Yes.
Well look at these weird correlations the random comparator engine picked up.

Matthew 11:15 KJVS
He that hath ears to hear, let him hear.
Revelation 11:15 KJVS
And the seventh angel sounded; and there were great voices in heaven, saying, The kingdoms of this world are become the kingdoms of our Lord, and of his Christ; and he shall reign for ever and ever.

Matthew 13:9 KJVS
Who hath ears to hear, let him hear.
Revelation 13:9 KJVS
If any man have an ear, let him hear.

Tri says, That's like righteous weird dude.

The Middle 1

Swan says, Dude!
Crab, Yo.
Swan, We're about to turn twenty one in dog years.
Crab, Mmm Hmm.
Swan, Listen
Crab interjects, I'm all ears.
Swan, We should go to Vegas. You know what happens there stays there.
Crab, Yeah, just don't bring home something you don't want.
Swan, Uh heh heh. Well that's not what I'm thinking. Like, we could blow a few clam shells and have some laughs.
Crab, Hey, isn't some big lake near there?
Swan, Yeah. And there's even snow skiing near by.
Crab, Get out! I could slide down on my back. Let's do it!

The Opening 7

Even at an early age crabettes were confused by Crab. He used well reasoned arguments, rather than brash mindless boasting of conquest.
Swanettes were mysteriously attracted to Tri. I'ld lay his eggs any time, they'd say.

The Opening 6

As time rolled on crab and swan matured. Crab became slightly more refined, which crabs naturally mistook for weakness. Of course he gave them a good thrashing to set the record straight. Swan took on an edge that served him well. Tempered by his parents, he rose in the pecking order.

The Opening 5

The Crabs, true to their name, chose a less diplomatic approach. Son! You can't keep hanging around with those pansies. You need to toughen up.

Dad, it's only one pansy, my best friend.

Son, honestly,  you'll never get to the top of the crab pile playing "Bombs Away" and looking for colored sea glass. I know you're young, but you should start showing some interest in crabettes.

Dad, I'm only three.

Note to Parents

I know what you're thinking.  This content is way too mature for my little snookums. Hang in there, it has a happy ending. After all I'm the guy who says, can't we just all get along?  And barring that, let's just do things my way.
So, strap yourself in and...

Turn the page.

The Opening 4

Swan's parents would gently encourage Swan to play with his own kind. Swan, they would say, we think the world of Crab. One thing to keep in mind is that crabs have a very different pecking order. And remember, crabs are not known for their social acumen. Sweety we want what's best for you and crab. Crab needs to learn the harsh abrasive ways of crabdom, while you need to explore the graceful subtleties of swandom.

The Opening 3

One of their games was Bombs Away! Crab would run straight at the water across wet sand and Tri world scoop him up while flying low. Then from a reasonable height Crab would look down and estimate when they were On Target.

The Opening 2

It was first thought that Space Crabs were magical, because they could simply pick up massive objects with their flat faces. It turns out they are able to refocus gravitational fields to magnify the effects of gravity around their heads. In order for this to work they must be within one billion light years of a significant celestial body.

Whenever Crab would use this ability Tri would say, "I'm sure glad I'm not your enemy! " They would both laugh.